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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25803922">Here Without You</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaywardFairchild/pseuds/WaywardFairchild'>WaywardFairchild</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Parkner Week 2020 [9]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Letters, Love Confessions, Love Letters, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Presumed Dead, Temporary Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 11:55:21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,183</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25803922</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaywardFairchild/pseuds/WaywardFairchild</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Parkner Week Day 9: pinning</p><p>Harley and Peter loved each other... something happens.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harley Keener/Peter Parker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Parkner Week 2020 [9]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1859515</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Parkner Week 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Here Without You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Here Without You by 3 Doors Down would fit with this fic but I didn't intend for it to fit. </p><p>This may not reveal until later but the italics are important...</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Harley Keener fell in love with Peter Parker while working with him. Peter was intelligent and beautiful. He wanted to ask him out but he never could. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You know how much I love you but I can never say anything while I lay in your arms. Because I can’t break up our friendship because it means more than being yours.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peter Parker loved Harley Keener. He loved how he would care for his sister, how he cared for Morgan, and how he cared for Tony. Peter wanted to ask him out but he never could.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Because if I told you that you were the one then you would have left me there. I cannot ruin what we have because I have fallen in love with my best friend.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Harley Keener and Peter Parker would catch each other’s eyes in the halls at school, in the labs, and across the table. They would stare and everyone knew that they loved the other but they would never say anything. They would just say that the other didn’t like them back as they watched their love walk around thinking that they were alone in the world. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I always wanted to tell you. In the hall, in the lab, and even when we were just cuddling on the couch. You were the one that I would think about. The one who I had fallen in love with. Because life without you would be harder than just being your friend. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>MJ, Ned, Harry, and Betty had all tried to get them to admit their feelings. It would be easier than watching them dance around each other. Peter and Harley acted like a couple but the two couldn’t seem to see it. No one could convince them. No one could tell them the truth without the others deny that the other would never fall for them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I loved you more than I loved myself I think. That is the scary part of all of this. I loved you so much and that is why this is hard for me to admit because if you are reading this then I may have not ever been able to tell you and that hurts worse than anything else. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>May and Macy had a joke about how they had their wedding planned out. Harley and Peter would roll their eyes at them. Harley had once asked Peter about why he hadn’t dated and all he could say is that the person he liked didn’t like him back. Harley said the same thing when Peter asked him. Neither could admit that the other was the one they loved. Neither could admit that they wanted to lay in the other’s arms. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>When they would tell us that we loved each other, I knew they were joking. You used to pick me up and spin me around and I would get so red. You never noticed. My cheeks were so red that I wondered if you knew my secret. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tony had even told the two that they should stop pinning in the lab. The two would look at him confused. He had tried to make his two idiot Pseudo sons see the truth but neither of them could apparently. That was the worse part about it. He saw how much they cared about each other but nothing changed between the two of them. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I apologize for not telling you sooner or before this, all happened because I wanted you to know. I swear I did. Because this secret was my deepest secret and the only secret that I was hiding from you. I love you and I will always love you.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peter and Harley told the other everything except that they both liked the other. They tried to tell the other but it was hard to say something when you didn’t know how to say it or how it might affect your relationship. It becomes easier to just lie sometimes then to tell the truth. Because sometimes the truth hurts and the boys didn’t want to put that on the boy that they loved so they kept on dancing around each other. They didn’t want to hurt the other.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>So I guess this is my love confession. A sucky one since you probably are mourning me right now, but you need to know that I loved you every day of my life and if I could I would love you into my next life as well. Because you deserve someone to love you.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they got the news it hurt. Harley had watched the reports but he hoped it was all a lie. That his Peter was out there still and not dead at the bottom of a lake. Harley searched but never got to bring Peter home. He was gone and now Harley had to pretend that everything was alright.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I love you more then I could ever love myself and that is the scary thing. Because you are the better half of me. I want you to know that even if I am dead that I want you to move on because you deserve to have someone hold you as you deserve. You know that sounds like we were in love with each other when it was just one-sided. I guess I will always be a fool, Harls.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Harley found the letters. Everyone read the one they were given but Harley waited a week. He didn’t want to read the words that Peter had written for him. He didn’t want to hear his friend’s dying words that were planned maybe weeks in advance. He finally broke down and read them only to cry as he found out the truth about his best friend. Peter had loved him. That was the worse part. He could have been holding Peter close. Instead, he lost him before he had him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry for never telling you how I felt, but you must have known that I cared so much for you. You were my light in the night. You were the person I went to about everything. This was the only secret that I hid from you. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tony came home one night to find Harley on the couch with the paper. He smiled as he picked up the boy and laid him in Peter’s bed. He would tell him in the morning he decided. Tony had FRIDAY set to tell him if Harley awoke before he left again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>If I could change one thing, it would have been kissing those lips of yours because I have memorized your eyes but I never memorized your lips.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tony had a surprise for Harley. Harley didn’t want a surprise though. He walked into Medbay confused until he saw the boy with a few bruises. Harley ran over and looked him over. The boy was awake and looked surprised to see him. Before he could tell Harley anything, Harley kissed the other boy. Their first kiss as they sat there. Peter would later find out about Harley reading the note, but for now, the two had some time to make up. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here with Parkner: https://discord.gg/udFM7MYvBB</p></blockquote></div></div>
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